Was at an intra-house cultural festival at my kid’s school over the weekend. This was a revelation of sorts for an easy going, laid back, and lazy parent like me. Here I was telling my kids on my way to the fest, fear no more, the champ is with you and rattled laurels I had won as a kid in such festivals, little did I realise that I would get hammered and return home bruised and empty handed. I ended up realizing that competitions were serious stuff and not anymore the fun thing I was used to. Sadly I understood a tad too late that the fun element had long disappeared from these competitions.
Professionalism had taken over the innocent performance of kids, expressions were taught, costumes were outsourced, the props were built, and backdrops were no longer the plain boring whites, the make ups were made up of foundations and super structures. Hey, this is no civil engineering, just make up, wake up to reality and smell the coffee, I told myself. The costumes were Fedexed over night from Mumbai. And then it sunk, gone are the days when I could make do with my mom’s old 'pattu' sari to do a King Herod or one of the three wise men who visited Jesus.
Shocked at the competition levels and the outsourced resources at hand I witnessed, I was telling myself, my kids are missing on so much fun; sorry, this is definitely not a, I-told-you-I-have–seen-it-all story nor is it a story of sour grapes. I realized that parents walk that extra mile or more to fulfil THEIR lost dreams through their kids.
Half sleepy, barely interested, and un-enthusiastic kids were adorned with the best of costumes and jewellery and were literally pushed on stage to perform and they did perform, just like most of us corporate slaves do, expecting an incentive.
Their performances were brilliant, but something was missing. Their eye movements were (dis)oriented towards their anxious parents and appeared as though they were pleading 'am I doing ok, am I doing well, am I meeting your expectations' an expression in which the child was lost in the dreams of his / her parents. I could sense that the child was living some else's dream.
On my way back I told my kids it is not about winning or losing it is all about enjoying your 3 or 4 minutes on stage. I’m not sure I was wrong or right. But once back home I asked them to rate their performance sadly they rated themselves low. But little did they realise that it was their dad who let them down…. on second thoughts, Did I???
I was a know-it-all dad, who had not grown up to accept the realities of the world, a dumb dad who thinks competing is still fun, and a stupid dad who still thinks winning or losing doesn’t matter.
My kids had lost competing with the dads/moms of their co-participants; they lost to kids who actually did not know if they enjoyed what they did because they were doing it for their dads or moms who were busy shooting pictures and videos, looking for brownies (aka Likes) on their next Facebook posting.
As I now tuck them in bed and see them sleep peacefully, content with no worry in the world I’m happy I won when all those parents lost, even though their kids brought THEM laurels.
Sadly even this piece in which the protagonist was the kid with lost childhood ends on a note where the parent wins!!! In short it is the battle of the parents trying to win their dreams these days.
God save us from the tribe of selfish parents, I’m happy I was born in an era when God still made selfless parents!
Saturday, June 7, 2014
Saturday, May 3, 2014
I, me, myself and Cheese!!!
The latest obsession of mankind is HIM. Well some might say this is not new, mankind was always obsessed with them. Some of those self-obsessed men have also altered the course of history. I wrote a couple of years back that prefixing a series of gadgets with the letter ‘I’ was in a sense a symbolic representation of the transformation our society was going through. Every man unto himself was the order of the day and the mushrooming of social networks just increased it. Social fellowship with the help of your smart devices was enabled from the confines of your living room were you renewed your emotional connect with your high school chums. Well this is not certainly my idea of a healthy social behaviour until you smell the coffee, bite the cookie and pinch your friend.
Around 600 odd years back the acclaimed artists of the Renaissance period started to paint themselves, thus was born the art of self-portrait. With the advent of mirrors in the 15th century the artist had a new tool to express themselves. It is said that in some of the works the artist depicted themselves without a hand, the hand that was actually painting. Mirror technology was still at its nascent stage, larger mirrors were hard to find and transport and hence the images were only as big and as good as the mirrors. Rembrandt, Da Vinci, Van Gogh you name them, they did it, their Self-portraits.
You might wonder at the reason I am hoping from modern day social network behaviour in one paragraph to 15th century self-portraits in the next. Well the link is the obsession of the modern day man to selfies. Yes SELFIES is the newly coined word for a picture of you taken by yourself using your own smart phone and posted on the virtual world and then waiting for comments, likes and shares to happen.
Just as mirror technology was making its way in the 15th century the camera resolution technology and it’s positioning on a telecommunication device like a phone was becoming more and more relevant so much so that phones are being designed with higher resolution on its front facing cameras to facilitate the projection of a better self-image. (Irrespective what your actual self-image in the social realm was)
This selfie bug has caught on like a virus so much so that politicians, artists and people from all walks of life don’t miss out on an opportunity to take a selfie of them. Be it at the Oscars, award functions or even at polling booths or an illegitimate union, the last two of which recently got a couple of high profile politicians in trouble.
We are suddenly seeing multiple offshoots of a selfie, the most famous of them being the recent pictures of inked fingers as testimony to exercising one’s franchise. This I named impulsively as fingfie when I first saw it but the media were quick to rename it the fingie getting rid of one redundant alphabet, redundant for me, but valuable for the twiteratti where an alphabet saved is an alphabet expressed. So going by this, you can take a picture of any part of your anatomy and suffix it with an ‘ie’ and viola you have selfie of ‘IT’. My dirty mind does think of a few but they sound so unprintable and hence I refrain.
Today we call it a selfie, even when more than one are present, shouldn’t it be called wefie or an usfie. Yours truly would like to patent it along with ‘selfiegram’ for a website on which you could post only selfies but digitally modified to look better, slimmer or fairer.
There is a beeline among celebrities to get longer arms, the six packs are passé. The longer arms at least will prevent us from getting a sneak peek into sweaty or hairy armpits of the selfie taker. So all you smart phone makers listen to the end users, along with better resolutions we need wide angle capability too to keep our arm pits out of the frame.
I intend to take a selfie of myself facing a mirror cutting off the arm with the phone from the frame to symbolically represent the coming together of the art of 15th century and the technology of the 21st century.
Around 600 odd years back the acclaimed artists of the Renaissance period started to paint themselves, thus was born the art of self-portrait. With the advent of mirrors in the 15th century the artist had a new tool to express themselves. It is said that in some of the works the artist depicted themselves without a hand, the hand that was actually painting. Mirror technology was still at its nascent stage, larger mirrors were hard to find and transport and hence the images were only as big and as good as the mirrors. Rembrandt, Da Vinci, Van Gogh you name them, they did it, their Self-portraits.
You might wonder at the reason I am hoping from modern day social network behaviour in one paragraph to 15th century self-portraits in the next. Well the link is the obsession of the modern day man to selfies. Yes SELFIES is the newly coined word for a picture of you taken by yourself using your own smart phone and posted on the virtual world and then waiting for comments, likes and shares to happen.
Just as mirror technology was making its way in the 15th century the camera resolution technology and it’s positioning on a telecommunication device like a phone was becoming more and more relevant so much so that phones are being designed with higher resolution on its front facing cameras to facilitate the projection of a better self-image. (Irrespective what your actual self-image in the social realm was)
This selfie bug has caught on like a virus so much so that politicians, artists and people from all walks of life don’t miss out on an opportunity to take a selfie of them. Be it at the Oscars, award functions or even at polling booths or an illegitimate union, the last two of which recently got a couple of high profile politicians in trouble.
We are suddenly seeing multiple offshoots of a selfie, the most famous of them being the recent pictures of inked fingers as testimony to exercising one’s franchise. This I named impulsively as fingfie when I first saw it but the media were quick to rename it the fingie getting rid of one redundant alphabet, redundant for me, but valuable for the twiteratti where an alphabet saved is an alphabet expressed. So going by this, you can take a picture of any part of your anatomy and suffix it with an ‘ie’ and viola you have selfie of ‘IT’. My dirty mind does think of a few but they sound so unprintable and hence I refrain.
Today we call it a selfie, even when more than one are present, shouldn’t it be called wefie or an usfie. Yours truly would like to patent it along with ‘selfiegram’ for a website on which you could post only selfies but digitally modified to look better, slimmer or fairer.
There is a beeline among celebrities to get longer arms, the six packs are passé. The longer arms at least will prevent us from getting a sneak peek into sweaty or hairy armpits of the selfie taker. So all you smart phone makers listen to the end users, along with better resolutions we need wide angle capability too to keep our arm pits out of the frame.
I intend to take a selfie of myself facing a mirror cutting off the arm with the phone from the frame to symbolically represent the coming together of the art of 15th century and the technology of the 21st century.
Thursday, May 1, 2014
Disgusting Democratic Discourse!
With the month long Indian elections meandering its way to an end, one thing that stood out this time was the political lingua that played out during the entire campaigning phase. It was a joy to hear political debates of the yesteryears when the focus of the debate revolved mostly around the agenda and promises of the rival parties. The fact that these promises or agendas never saw light at the end of the day is another story for another day; at least the language and the dignity with which these electoral speeches were scripted and delivered were exemplary.
The words and phrases that have been used in these elections have marked a new low in the discourse of parliamentary democracy. The political parties have vied with each other to raise the bar or rather raise the belt so that they get sufficient terrain below the belt to play with. In fact they were competing with their rivals to earn black points from the Election Commission that they considered electoral brownies.
The would be parliamentarians have indulged themselves in a verbal free for all which made it appear like a curtain raiser of their presence and performance in the next five years inside the august house. The only solace was that the un-parliamentary behaviour / language was outside the sanctum sanctorum during the curtain raiser, but would soon move in, come the 16th of May.
Some of the points / words / phrases around which the debates revolved were, the importance of a 56 inch chest to rule the country, abbreviated family names, scurrying rodents, a soft drink slogan, one called the other a butcher, while, someone said the other was honeymooning and furthermore some came up with very harsh communal overtones. However the clincher was, when one senior parliamentarian claimed he was better at hiding his girlfriend than the aspirant to the big power seat was, at hiding his wife. Can it get any better? It sounded more like a street fight among 5th graders after losing a game of cricket. Comparison to 5th graders is actually a compliment to these guys, because they discussed toffees too which normally figures in 2nd grader conversations. Each and every one of those above phrases was picked up and deliberated on prime time by the TRP hungry media.
Well it is understandable that when the stakes are high, tempers are bound to fly but unfortunately what I found was most of the modern day politicians have been too naïve and played their way into the hands of the media who have had a professionally fulfilling last 45 odd days.
My only prayer and wish is that, good sense prevails amongst these would-be parliamentarians and they realise how fortunate they are to lead a country so diverse yet united given all the shortcomings. Somewhere amongst the discourse of toffees, butchers, rats and 56 inch chests, the fact that we nudged Japan to become the 3rd largest economy speaks volumes of the efforts and resilience of WE THE PEOPLE. Democracy they say is of the people, by the people, and for the people. Fortunately or unfortunately the ones who were found squabbling over trivial issues in their political discourses are one among us. I’m not sure if they will be FOR THE PEOPLE when they enter the gates of the parliament later this month.
I was certainly disgusted with the democratic debates of this elections and hence the title, and as rightly pointed out by my daughter who made a passing remark asking me if I was writing about the 3rd Dimension of Democracy since it had 3D’s.
That’s when I realised this was certainly the 3rd, but the ugliest dimension to the democratic process I have been witness to in the last 4 decades.
The words and phrases that have been used in these elections have marked a new low in the discourse of parliamentary democracy. The political parties have vied with each other to raise the bar or rather raise the belt so that they get sufficient terrain below the belt to play with. In fact they were competing with their rivals to earn black points from the Election Commission that they considered electoral brownies.
The would be parliamentarians have indulged themselves in a verbal free for all which made it appear like a curtain raiser of their presence and performance in the next five years inside the august house. The only solace was that the un-parliamentary behaviour / language was outside the sanctum sanctorum during the curtain raiser, but would soon move in, come the 16th of May.
Some of the points / words / phrases around which the debates revolved were, the importance of a 56 inch chest to rule the country, abbreviated family names, scurrying rodents, a soft drink slogan, one called the other a butcher, while, someone said the other was honeymooning and furthermore some came up with very harsh communal overtones. However the clincher was, when one senior parliamentarian claimed he was better at hiding his girlfriend than the aspirant to the big power seat was, at hiding his wife. Can it get any better? It sounded more like a street fight among 5th graders after losing a game of cricket. Comparison to 5th graders is actually a compliment to these guys, because they discussed toffees too which normally figures in 2nd grader conversations. Each and every one of those above phrases was picked up and deliberated on prime time by the TRP hungry media.
Well it is understandable that when the stakes are high, tempers are bound to fly but unfortunately what I found was most of the modern day politicians have been too naïve and played their way into the hands of the media who have had a professionally fulfilling last 45 odd days.
My only prayer and wish is that, good sense prevails amongst these would-be parliamentarians and they realise how fortunate they are to lead a country so diverse yet united given all the shortcomings. Somewhere amongst the discourse of toffees, butchers, rats and 56 inch chests, the fact that we nudged Japan to become the 3rd largest economy speaks volumes of the efforts and resilience of WE THE PEOPLE. Democracy they say is of the people, by the people, and for the people. Fortunately or unfortunately the ones who were found squabbling over trivial issues in their political discourses are one among us. I’m not sure if they will be FOR THE PEOPLE when they enter the gates of the parliament later this month.
I was certainly disgusted with the democratic debates of this elections and hence the title, and as rightly pointed out by my daughter who made a passing remark asking me if I was writing about the 3rd Dimension of Democracy since it had 3D’s.
That’s when I realised this was certainly the 3rd, but the ugliest dimension to the democratic process I have been witness to in the last 4 decades.
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Signs of Democracy
As the world’s biggest democracy gets ready for polls across the country spanning a good 35 days, sitting miles away I miss the poll frenzy and the accompanying vote mongering. They say democracy is on its last leg and the world is full of pseudo democracies tapering towards crony capitalism. This is not an effort to analyse the state of democracy or weigh its pros and cons, but merely an attempt to analyse the symbols and its associated significance to the democratic process in India.
The symbols of parties have always fascinated me, the importance that this has in our democracy is of monumental proportions since in a majority of the game changing regions across India the voter votes for the symbol ignorant of the party / candidate or his / their credentials if any.
The sprouting twin leaves competes bitterly with the rising sun even though a knowledge of elementary school level science will tell you the leaves are dependent on sunlight to survive. People supporting Sickle, hammer and star could actually see stars and die of hunger if ears of the corn or paddy on the woman’s head are not reaped with the help of a sickle.
How good a lotus is when there is no water, so in comes another party with hand pump as its symbol. Lotus symbolises divinity and sanctity but the very same divinity could prove to be their downfall being branded anti secular.
Then the omnipresent palm that can be interpreted in different ways depending on its orientation, a palm facing up is seeking money and could well be the hand behind the scams, a palm facing down says I don’t have any to spend on infrastructure, a palm positioned vertically says you get beaten black and blue if you fight for your fundamental rights. The lines on the palm along with planetary alignments dictate the electoral fortunes of the would be netha. The lack of confidence amongst most of them, their ideals and their symbols is what makes them go celestial and be dependent on the movement of the stars and planetary positions. Unfortunately the very same celestial interventions that are favourable to them make their subjects see stars for the next 5 years.
This is one of the main reasons that India has moved from an Aristocracy to Democracy and now to Astrocracy.
Other interesting symbols are the ladder that shows that sky is actually not the limit for this party but they stoop to much lower levels, bicycle is the next, you elect them and you are taken for a ride. A top for one that could leave you in a spin, the elephant that could well trample over you, the chair that they would be busy holding on to for the next 5 years.
The new kid on the block with good intentions came up with a broom thinking of making sweeping changes, little did they know that some amongst them were sweeping stuff under the carpet using the same broom, what they needed was a vacuum cleaner to cleanse a deep rooted malfunctioning system.
Stepping out of the voting booth many of us proudly display the ink on our finger as proof of exercising our franchise. Sadly irrespective of the symbol we voted for, the elected representative will soon show you the correct finger that had to be inked was, the one to the left and right of your ring finger on both your hands!!!
And irrespective of the party he is affiliated to, this will symbolise the democracy that he will represent for the next 5 years!!!
The symbols of parties have always fascinated me, the importance that this has in our democracy is of monumental proportions since in a majority of the game changing regions across India the voter votes for the symbol ignorant of the party / candidate or his / their credentials if any.
The sprouting twin leaves competes bitterly with the rising sun even though a knowledge of elementary school level science will tell you the leaves are dependent on sunlight to survive. People supporting Sickle, hammer and star could actually see stars and die of hunger if ears of the corn or paddy on the woman’s head are not reaped with the help of a sickle.
How good a lotus is when there is no water, so in comes another party with hand pump as its symbol. Lotus symbolises divinity and sanctity but the very same divinity could prove to be their downfall being branded anti secular.
Then the omnipresent palm that can be interpreted in different ways depending on its orientation, a palm facing up is seeking money and could well be the hand behind the scams, a palm facing down says I don’t have any to spend on infrastructure, a palm positioned vertically says you get beaten black and blue if you fight for your fundamental rights. The lines on the palm along with planetary alignments dictate the electoral fortunes of the would be netha. The lack of confidence amongst most of them, their ideals and their symbols is what makes them go celestial and be dependent on the movement of the stars and planetary positions. Unfortunately the very same celestial interventions that are favourable to them make their subjects see stars for the next 5 years.
This is one of the main reasons that India has moved from an Aristocracy to Democracy and now to Astrocracy.
Other interesting symbols are the ladder that shows that sky is actually not the limit for this party but they stoop to much lower levels, bicycle is the next, you elect them and you are taken for a ride. A top for one that could leave you in a spin, the elephant that could well trample over you, the chair that they would be busy holding on to for the next 5 years.
The new kid on the block with good intentions came up with a broom thinking of making sweeping changes, little did they know that some amongst them were sweeping stuff under the carpet using the same broom, what they needed was a vacuum cleaner to cleanse a deep rooted malfunctioning system.
Stepping out of the voting booth many of us proudly display the ink on our finger as proof of exercising our franchise. Sadly irrespective of the symbol we voted for, the elected representative will soon show you the correct finger that had to be inked was, the one to the left and right of your ring finger on both your hands!!!
And irrespective of the party he is affiliated to, this will symbolise the democracy that he will represent for the next 5 years!!!
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